Need a joke or funny line for your next poker party or to entertain your opponents when playing on the top poker sites for real money? Or maybe you just want to impress someone with a little bit of wordplay. Here are a few poker puns for you to try. Although, don’t blame us if your guests don’t laugh!
- Why did the poker player struggle to find love? Because he didn’t have any hearts!
- What’s a poker player’s favourite tool? A spade!
- Where is a poker player’s favourite place to swim? The river!
- Why do poker players make terrible drummers?! They can often be on a bad beat!
- What’s a poker player’s favourite meal? Chips!
- How do you communicate with a poker player? Call them!
- What is a poker player’s favourite way to pay the bill? By check!
- Why do poker players never become Hollywood actors? Because they can often act out of turn!
- What is a poker player’s least favourite tool? The rake!
- What can you find in a poker player’s wardrobe? At least four suits!
- What was the poker player doing at the gym? Card-io!
- What do the most confident poker players say about their chances at the table? That they will ace it!
- One poker player said he had won so many chips, he could start a potato farm!
- Why was the poker player so good at origami? Because he was very good at folding!
- Why did the poker player cancel his plans for Christmas? Because he couldn’t dealwith seeing the in-laws.
- Why do poker players love hosting parties? Because they love having a full house.
- Why do poker players want the King to use their toilet? Because they want a royal flush.
- Which animal likes to play poker? A full mouse!
- A poker player who was winning lots and lots decided to go to the bakery, but why? He was on a roll!
- Why did the poker player leave the table and go to the zoo instead? Because there were too many cheetahs!
- Why is Lady Gaga so good at card games? Because she’s got a great Poker Face.
- I checked if I was addicted to poker, then raised.
- Which animal is very good at playing poker? A Bluffalo.
- A family member died recently in Las Vegas, he’s in a bettor place now.
- Which medical professional is most likely to be good at poker? A cardiologist.
- The poker player took a phone call while at the table. Who was he talking to? I’m not sure but he was calling your bluff.
- Why can’t you play poker in the Arctic? Because it’s always a cold deck.
- Why couldn’t the tennis players finish their game of poker? Because they kept getting a deuce.
- Where do most poker players live? On Fifth Street!
- What does a poker player look for when they visit the bathroom? A good flush.
- Why do poker players compare glove sizes? For their hand rankings.
- Why do poker players like Halloween so much? Because they love a monster hand!
- What do poker players and meat eaters have in common? They both love steaks!
- Why do poker players love romance movies? Because they are very WSOPPY.
- My wife says she will divorce me if I keep playing poker at the casino but I think she is bluffing.
- When is it unacceptable to eat chips? When you’re at the poker table.
- Playing poker is really fun, just as long as it doesn’t get out of hand.
- Why is it hard to play poker in an apartment? There’s no such thing as a full flat.
- How can you tell what your opponent’s hand is saying? Become a palm reader.
- Why wouldn’t the poker player put down his cards? He liked to hold ’em.
- A ladder started playing poker with us last night, he kept on raising.
- A cell phone started playing with us last night at the casino, he would only call.
- Why does Batman not enjoy playing poker? He can run into the Joker.
- Why shouldn’t you play poker with angry tigers and alligators? You’ll lose every hand!
- Why did the dealer leave his job at the casino? He couldn’t deal with it anymore.
- Where do poker players go on holiday? Tibet.
- Why are confident poker players no good at washing? They don’t even fold their laundry!
- Why do vampires not enjoy playing poker? They don’t like the stakes!
- What game is played by handsome men? Stud poker.
- Which card game for artists like to play? Draw poker.
- Which card game brings out a bad attitude in poker players? Three card brag.